THE WORST FLIGHT EVER

So I am sitting at the Houston airport. I just got off the worst
flight of my life. The "flight attendant" was CRAZY! She was
harassing people left and right. She took it upon herself to choose
me as her favorite victim. First she strolled down the aisle asking
people to move their bags under their seats. Even if they were as far
as they could possibly go under the seat. My strap on my bag was
sticking out so of course I was one of the chosen ones. I was just
like "OK". I thought it was strange, but she was obviously someone
who took this job just a little too seriously! But whatever. She
told the guy in front of me to take his planner out of the seat back
in front of him. She thought it was his laptop and she didn't want
him to get struck in the head should we crash. OK, then! I thought
maybe his planner might not be the worst of his troubles should we
need to use our seat cushions as floatation devices! But whatever.
Once again someone just taking this a bit far.
We have now taken off. We are in the air and she is handing out the
always wonderful snack size package of pretzels. We were about half
way down the aisle. So Troy, Mia and I are all on our iPods. Troy
and Mia are watching a movie and I am reading my book. She gets to us
with the pretzels and stops dead in her tracks. "WHY DO YOU GUYS HAVE
YOUR ELECTRONIC DEVICES ON?" She says loud enough to embarrass me
like a teacher would in the middle of an eighth grade English class. I
basically told her that we were watching them. She then goes on to
tell me that we are not allowed to use them yet. I explained that I
thought we could since we were in the air and the fact that she was
handing out pretzels. Usually to me that means we are good to go. (I
have only been flying all my life, so maybe there was some new rule I
was not aware of?) She then tells me that we are not allowed to use
them until she makes the announcement. So I ask her "OK, when will
you be making that announcement?" She turns around and looks down the
aisle and says "It's OK to use them now, I'm just kiddin'." I was a
little frustrated by this point because I have just had attention
drawn to me and she was just kidding? So I am pretty sure I had my
WTF? look on my face while saying "Um, OK, whatever. I don't know why
you made it such a big deal then." She started yelling at me. "WHAT
DO YOU MEAN IT IS NOT A BIG DEAL? WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT IS NOT A BIG
DEAL?" I was like hold it sister! I said to her "You know what
honey, I don't want to get into this with you right now in front of my
child, so can you just keep on going down the aisle?" She asked me to
repeat myself so I explained to her once again that I do not find it
necessary to discuss this with her any longer in front of my child.
She then got all flustered, turned around and walked back towards the
cockpit and called THE PILOT!! I started to get really worried that
this lunatic was going to claim I was going to rush the cabin or
something and the local police would be greeting me in Houston! After
about a minute, she got on the overhead speaker announcing "All
electronic devices are now allowed to be used." And from there she
continued to hand out pretzels and drinks and pace UP and DOWN the
aisle the whole entire flight. She kept stopping at me asking me if I
was done with my coffee cup. After like the third time and a really
annoyed look on my face, she finally left that alone. But she was not
through with me yet! I swear she was searching for something,
anything to just harass me about! When we were preparing for landing
(which is another story in itself) she was yet again pacing. So she
stops right at me and in her most lovely harassing tone says "Ma'am,
would you please put your seat back all the way forward?" I just sat
there and gave her a huge puzzled look. I never put it back! She
then takes it upon herself to grab my arm rest and push my seat up.
Of course it goes nowhere since it was already up all the way. I
just basically confirmed that she is CRAZY!
I really wish I had not let this nut job get to me. I was bawling the
whole entire flight. Why do I constantly have to interact with these
rude people who will in no way be reprimanded for their actions!

I just had to vent. Troy just laughs. While we de-boarded he asked
me if I wanted to get one last jab in at her. Sometimes I am not sure
that he understands how that stuff upsets me.

My Mom is at the Liquor Store buying the ingredients for the
Margaritas Hornitos as we speak! I hope we are not delayed too long
here. I just need to get my vacation REstarted. And I was in such a
great mood this morning! Now I am all depressed and all my make up is
off! Wish I could just wipe this morning out of my memory. But now
that I have written about it, I am going to just let it be.